The Loudmouth Protestant

January 26, 2010

This Valentine’s Day

Filed under: life,love,relationships — nickisym @ 9:20 pm
Tags: , ,

A dozen white rosesI bought these for myself on a whim while grocery shopping last night. I’ve always wanted someone to buy me flowers, someone I actually like. I’ve received flowers about four times in my life. Two of those bouquets came from female friends on the same day, the last day at my old job. One bouquet came from a young man who was trying to “holla” at me in college. I’ll admit, he did a good job with buying a dozen red roses and getting into my apartment to leave them on my desk. It was a nice touch, but sadly, I didn’t like him. And the last bouquet actually came from my last Valentine, which would seem like a good thing, but it really wasn’t. This Valentine’s Day, I want flowers.

I’ve danced a lot in my lifetime, by myself, in big groups, facing a man, not facing a man, but the most memorable moments were the slow dances. They always took place with people I remember to this day. There were the slow dances that took place at high school homecomings and proms; the dances that happened at parties in college; the dances that happened in my room—get your mind out of the gutter; each of those dances I remember. They were slow, intimate, deliberate, sentimental, gentle, memorable. I remember them all. This Valentine’s Day, I want the slow dance. The real one, not the bump n’ grind one to Trey Songz’s “Invented Sex”.

I’ve only had one Valentine in my 29 years of life. Hopefully I am not forgetting one, but if I am, I suppose that means it wasn’t that memorable. This one Valentine wasn’t even necessarily someone I liked a whole lot, but, he pulled out all the stops buying me the dozen roses, the card with writing that went beyond just “Heart John Doe”, the dinner that wasn’t modest for a college student’s budget and I seem to recall a slow dance. Yeah, all that from someone I wasn’t even in love with, but I remember it well because he thought enough of me to do those things. Eight years later—I’m telling on myself—I hope for something different this Valentine’s day.

As my dear friend Jovian put it, “I typically don’t get overwhelmed with the hype of Valentine’s day”, but I had to come clean this year.  I’ve come a long way since I was dressed in all black like the omen on Valentine’s Day. I’m a little more like India.Arie in my readiness and El Debarge in what I’m waiting to give. This Valentine’s Day, I just want things to be different. Ideally I want to wake up on Sunday February 14th and, with the joy of the Lord in my heart, I want to think about someone and get butterflies because I know, without a doubt, someone is thinking about me too. Everything I said I wanted above, is everything I am more than willing to give. I just want Valentine’s Day, for once, to be different than it has ever been…



  1. I want the butterflies!!! YEES.

    Comment by Jovi — January 27, 2010 @ 12:45 pm | Reply

  2. I am right there with you! I would love a Valentine, someone I really like and would enjoy to spend the day with. However, I don’t see it happening this year, and instead of boo hooing the “I don’t have a boo” blues I’m embracing my singleness and having a Single Ladies’ Valentine’s Day Celebration, and I am so excited about it. Honestly, my girls have been my best Valentines to date, so I am looking forward to spending the day with them; no male bashing or boohooing or being bitter, only appreciating each other and celebrating our singleness!

    I hope you have everything you want this Valentine’s Day, and even if it does not go exactly as you wish, I wish you a HAPPY Valentine’s Day 🙂

    Comment by Miss Journey — February 9, 2010 @ 1:28 am | Reply

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